and thats when i went through the window and a shard of glass got stuck in my ass. the doctor said it was the best injury hed seen all month. i am a champion of life.
At one point during the moaning he reminded me of Forrest Gump
And he showed us your test. You wrote what is this shit and scribbled on it? Nice 3%..
i have now learned nap means the same thing as sex in college
We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
And just when I was about to fall asleep, he hit me in the face, and claimed he's a "violent sleeper".
I'm glad you trust me to be your sex stat keeper.
and do you remember when you were dressing me if i had money in my bra?
Well, there goes the no drunk sex injuries resolution.
I'm starting to second guess shaving my vagina over the kitchen sink. The lighting is so much better though.
Somehow he made it really romantic
He came on your tits... That doesn't scream romance to me.
Suspicion confirmed. my mom has her nipples pierced
Way to crack the case Nancy Drew
We don't know where he is but he left his pants and what appears to be a tooth here so he's gotta come back sometime
He went down on me for an hour and a half. He needs to get promoted more often.
Our livers get a hall pass for 2020, right?
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