Where the fuck is Rob at, he hasnt answered his phone in like 2 weeks.
Dude Rob died 2 weeks ago wtf?
Holy shit r u serious? How?
Just kidding, but im pretty sure he boned your gf and doesnt want to talk to you.
I like how you refer to peeing in the car as "super cute"
I can’t believe the potential orgy I left behind at Waffle House.
my iphone just auto-corrected drink to drnknghhhg...
Some girl in the stall next to me just yelled "fuck yes i started my period!" she came out of the stall and we high fived. who am i to judge? i do that every month.
He puked at the bar then immediately procceded to slip in it, they loaded him up into a wheelchair, then the staff and myself walked him outside, all the while never having to pay for our tab. SO using this strategy again
I know it sounds like a good idea, but doing Spanish homework at a bar just because the owners are Mexican and they give us margaritas really wasn't the best decision.
I think I just tested my sobriety limits for unicycling.
I don't know how, but he made a bong out of a hamster wheel. To say I am impressed is an understatement.
hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today
It's one of those things you just need to see in person at least once in your life. Like Niagara falls or some shit. His ass is the Niagara falls of asses
I think the solution to your phobia is an open relationship with your dildo. about the same responsibility as a pet rock
I'm pricing out a roll of that wax butcher paper. We fuck too messy and I can't afford to wash them every afternoon.
Like I want to yell at him for pissing on my floor but there's still a chance its my pee....
He wanted to watch the vow, cuddle, and not have sex. An upgrade is in order.
Randomize
