I Once took so much Ecstacy that I tried to hug a fire.
Let me tell you a story about the rise and fall of my self esteem
he smells like the inside of heather mills' fake leg
I just found out why they dont make table-dance tables out of glass.
In attempts to Not be THAT GIRL in front of my new crush I will only drink a 12 pack instead of my normal case.
When we woke up, I asked if we could play "what does your name rhyme with".....he said 'bave' thank god it was easy
Was I shouting at a fire engine last Friday?
there is nothing like a happy birthday present when you wake up with a bow on your vagina.
No more drinking with Em. She was on the ground so much she looked like she belongs in a lifealert commercial
Everyone heard you scream that I was to be naked, in your bed in 5 minutes. We were one hell of a shitshow spectacle
Chris used to fill up a Camel Back for thirsty Thursday. God I really miss him, do you remember when he gets out of jail?
I smoked out of two pipes at the same time while my friends wielded the lighters last night. It felt like I graduated to the next level of stoner.
just woke up on the floor of my shower...it was still runnning
Like I don't care that he's a drug dealer, but I have a problem with his inefficient and ineffective business model.
Eh, I don't question what my penis likes. It just does what it does.