we saw you sitting at the door of the dorm trashed, wrapped in DANGER tape with a stolen balloon around your wrist
I cant believe Lindsay Lohan feels like this every day
beeferoni + vodka = puke stuck in braces.
they just named my boobs. Lefty is "Guenevere" and Righty is "I claim this boob for America"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
remember.. you're not a homewrecker.. you're just creating options for him..
I vagually remember taking your birthcontrol and washing it down with ash water
You were running around waving the flier in everyone's face and thats how we ended up in a church eating free breakfast tacos at 3 am
How was that my fault?! I made you breakfast and gave you cake, as you asked. Then, you initiated sexual activity.
He can't just hit it and quit it and then eat your pop tarts on his way out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What's an appropriate outfit for wearing to hangout with a girl you've talked to once, and had a 4way with?
I've orgasmed so many times tonight I think I've become enlightened
No. There is no way we have to stoop so low as to ask your dad for weed. There has to be an alternative.
he made me cum so hard i had an asthma attack
My uterus just tried to get me to buy a tub of cookie dough
Just so we're clear, drunk and naked is not appropriate attire for Thanksgiving. Do it this year and Grandma will ban you for life.
Randomize