Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
when you close your eyes do you see, that mystical creature will be me.
who is this?
At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
you puked in the cab and all over yourself and tried to convince the cabby it was there already when he got upset... then you puked again. not too convincing are you
i think the sales of Rosetta Stone are directly related to the size of that woman's tit's
The dean held back my hair as I was puking after graduation. That means so much more than a diploma and a handshake.
ME TOO. Am adrunk madr out qith. White guy. Guy de white. Blanco chico. Chico de blanco
Hangover Status: I've been bedridden longer than that kid from The Secret Garden. It's not looking good.
So you met him?
More like I walked in on him, drunk, naked, and doing "bathtub yoga". Please stop bringing your dates home.
I just witnessed my first non cocain induced sunrise in five years.
Not my cup of tea
The fact that you think I have a life is so flattering to me.
I'm proud of you for choosing to be an organ donor on your fake!!
I have drunkenly angered a family of raccoons. Please send help immediately.
Thinking about licking your asshole. And hugs and stuff too I guess.
Why is there a mildly painful bruise on my back?
You slipped off the sink last night.
Why was I on the sink......?
;)
Randomize
