You and your empty threats of no sex. Like.u.cud.hold.out.
Apparently i was the first person to introduce her to her clitoris. Needless to say...they hit it off great
If you die in college, do you die in real life?
dude, showing up drunk to physics was the best idea ever. I just tripled my participation for the semester. I love st pattys day
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey I have to teach you how to run in heels before vegas
Its piss that you smell... I borrowed that shirt last week. Sooo, wanna grab some laundry soap on your way home? And good luck on your date.
bouncer thought i was tryin to get the license plate numbers of strippers to stalk them. I had to go show him where I threw up to get back in.
When She took off her bra.... A tube of lipgloss, her phone, I.D. And a wad of twenties fell out.... I'm officially no longer a butt man
Ethically speaking on a scale from 1 to morally wrong, how wrong would it be to give babies ambien? Hypothetically speaking.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
there COULD be a gas leak in our house... proceeding to smoke with extreme caution...
All I've had today is a brownie and a shot of Jack, so you know. I'm doing ok.
tanning, a slurpee, and a cigarette. spa day college edition
He had the same tone in his voice and look in his eyes that he gets when he says UFOs aren't real.
Sitting in the car eating a bagel. Watching a guy do tai chi in the parking lot. My morning is fabulous
Two questions: Did you enjoy your birthday present and how did i wake up with glitter all over my dick?
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