does dane cook know its not 2004 and that hes no longer relevant?
Took his v-card last night. Yet another experience I didn't expect to have in my thirties.
Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
fireball beer pong. youre missing out
how is that even possible?
ove gloves.
be there in ten.
Well, of course, to the untrained eye I look like a slut.
Ya I got a cut on my head from the toilet seat last time I drank there.
He made me write my name on his wall in crayon so he'd be able to remember it in the morning
Honestly I will go to church for him, I will even try to quit smoking for him. But his dick is not worth losing alcohol. He sure as fuck isn't taking away our wine nights.
Most desperate stoner moment; dropped our hard earned resin ball in the sand, rinsed it off and then did knife hits in the kitchen cuz we broke our only pipe
Lets both be adults and never talk about last night again.
I needed 3am water. Not 3am shots of rum.
If you hear a loud thud and smell ozone, I may have been electrocuted.
I just masturbated in the tanning bed stoned. Best decision of my life
Someone had to wrestle her in the chocolate pool, I'm glad I was man enough to step up and do it
Now swiping left on 23-year-olds with abs. Is this adulting?
Randomize
