I just told someone i was in "addition and subtraction 160".......and they believed me.
She had been watching Bad Girls Club where the annoying girl always says "I RUN L.A.". After she got wasted she kept going up to strangers at the bar yelling "I RUN FAYETTEVILLE." I peed in her drink.
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
Dude she's on meds. He has a ginormous penis. Ur A dumbass. That concludes our feelings chat. Dim Sumday?
I got us a lift home. Payment may require me giving road head, are you cool just chilling in the back seat pretending to be oblivious to this happening?
When did it become appropriate to call your mother the morning after? While still naked in bed? WHEN?!
what the hell is that chicken wire thing she's holding?
An artistic expression of her stupidity.
We joked about how funny it would be if he got pulled over with 300 breakfast burritos in hus car. We walk outside of the school just as the police lights turn on and pull him over
Oh by "being festive" I mean make tacos for dinner.
The only alcohol at my aunts was mikes hard so I drank 9 of them and puked in the master bath
My vape juice got mixed up with the astroglide.
Wow..I bet that tasted bad.
Not tasted.
Currently watching high school football on ESPN. Drink every time they say 'this kid's got potential' or 'look at this kid go' or 'atta kid' We're done for..
Did anyone see us fucking last night on the giant turtle outside downtown Disney?
Wanna go get tea? Warning: I will be high in an hour.
Adulthood is putting your bongs in the dishwasher because you're too lazy to clean them manually.
Are you ok dude?
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