I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
update: the house isnt on fire anymore, but he is still pissing on all your stuff.
the house was on fire??
shit I thought I told you.
i just did my hair and make up to walk our dogs.. I hate being the single roommate
just once i'd like the "right thing" and the "topless thing" to be the SAME THING
in my lab write-up should i mention that i watered my plant with tequila?
not the best booty call
did she squirt?
only if tears count
Want to come over and play therapist and then fuck all the emotion away?
You want to get day drunk this afternoon and watch these guys build a house across the street?
My therapist keeps stopping to ask what 'hooking up' means
ITS ORAL SEX CAROL
he has a party story that rivals our "PTSD- soldier-with-a-knife" party story. I'm pretty sure this is part of some prophecy.
Lesson learned. Don't roleplay with a real knife.
He flew in from NY last night. We had sex in the back of my car in the airport parking lot and then he fed me fresh Babka (from Breads Bakery) as I drove him home. I can't decide if I love him or Babka more.
All of my friends are talking about changing their lives because they have an alcohol addiction and I'm over here reminding my boss that it's national beer day.
There is a cooked ham in the washing machine.
Lucky bitch I'm at work covered in Jeff pee. And my hair smells like beer because I was trying to prove a point about PBR serving multiple purposes.
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