when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
Stop it. You sound like you're giving birth.
how ive managed to spend 100$ at an open bar is beyond me.
I'm ready for my liver to be the last casualty of 2009
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All i remember before i blacked out is you pointing to a random chick and telling me to bang her for America.
yeah he couldn't walk in a straight line and started throwing up and told the cop he just has an astigmatism
theres a wall by my room thats like, a prime fucking wall. before i move out SOMEBODY is gonna fuck me on that wall, goddamnit.
Bro I can't jerk it to my phone anymore. I feel Siri staring back, and she's real disappointed.
No, the responsible one does not yell out "lets go to iHop" at 5 in the morning to a bunch of drunk people with munchies.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She is wasted and this random lady got her to suckle milk from her tit
dude, you declined head because you wanted to tell her about how you put cinnamon in your weed. also, we're low on Chef Boyardee
N I'm drinking this invention I call "do-it-fluid" I had a bottle of vodka that was 3/4th empty, so I put in 1/4th rum, 1/4th tequila, 1/4th whisky... it's definitely the worst idea ever..
the last thing I remember is taking a pull of ever clear and chasing it with vodka
Just heard a 15 minute program on the radio about how cases of gonorrhea in the throat and rectum are skyrocketing in the US. Almost crashed laughing so hard.
Sorry, who is this??
is it just me or does "lol" kill any sort of vibe while sexting?
Randomize