I just found that girl ____ on facebook, her activities include "church nursery" yikes
I thought she had blonde hair
No, Gonorrhea actually
Wish i knew that 10 minutes ago when i told him to dance with my blackberry while i got another drink
Now you know why i just sit on the toilet and scream
Try denying you're gay when "I'm Not A Girl, But Not Yet A Woman" comes on Shuffle.
I need to shower. I still have paint on me from the homeless guys
i literally paused in the middle of it, turned on my light, pointed to the picture netxt to my bed and go "you hooked up with my roommate too!!! AWWW!" he was so weirded out. i don't think he understands the relationship we have..we share..
I'm making tacos. Give me one good reason why we shouldn't be high while eating those tacos.
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
You know it is an interesting night when the 911 operator calls you
Plus now I feel weird sleeping with you. It's like shooting a three legged deer. It's already at a disadvantage and couldn't get what it's full potential deserves.
Please tell me those naked pics were not your mom. Lie if you have to.
Looks like taco salad for lunch. I may have died and gone to be better circle in hell than I thought.
I haven't listened to news as I've been having lesbian sex all night. Anything new?
Yeah come over whenever. Weed gets here at 8.
I'll be there at 7:59.
Randomize
