Dont you think its a little early in the relationship for sexting?
I am not deleting the internet history anymore, now I am going for shock value.
eating kraft dinner with my face. no forks.
They high fived over us while we gave them synchronized blowjobs. In the same bed. Under the same blanket.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There is a contact in my phone named "Bar Mcntysu." this is why we need a third person to go out with us.
He was dressed in a pink dressing gown feeding people ketamine from a plastic sword he called Excalibur. how was your Monday?
DR UNK TOWN USA
TEAM USA GO AMERICA
that's how you measure success
By how bad my vagina hurts on a Tuesday morning while I'm trying to figure out how I got white girl wasted on a Monday?
I sleep texted my mom and asked her for a condom last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Exactly best part of my night he took of his shirt and surprise traveler fanny pack
How did I pull off convincing everyone that my name is Dad? Maybe they were just distracted by my boobs.
this party is nice, but i have to go home and cry over anime in order to fill my daily quota of suffering
You are driving me to get new toys, i am test driving them on the way home.
We are taking your truck.
When I woke up I had 6 missed calls making sure I was ok and asking if I remember showing my tits to a picture of her baby.
She's licking the vodka she spilled off the desk
Aaaaand now she's drinking it out of the shot glass like a cat
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