I wonder what it would be like to be a slice of cheese.
I told her at least we still had each other. That's when she started crying.
i dont need a football game to get drunk and yell at my tv
well after we realized that his best friend and my twin sister were hooking up it was kind of an unsopken agreement that we would too
just got a girls number while on a 5 am adderall cig break this is college at its finest
We turned everything surrounding BP and the oil leak into a "that's what she said" drinking game. We've been drunk for a month
the room spins SO much faster in panama
Vodka shot parachutes
Fucking utilizing a thrid story dorm room
This lumberjack with a huge beard is doing his group presentation in a dirty t shirt that says "I'm only 2 girls short of a threesome"
You're in the clear; you and Andrew did not joint fingerbang that girl on the dance floor last night.
I wish I could but I can't. No beer pong or sex on a hammock...such an unproductive weekend
I'm taking myself to the hospital right now b/c there is no way this erection is subsiding in the next 4 hours.
I just did a walk of shame on my own block. one of the old neighbors saw and greeted me "good morning, girl next door"
I knew my sister shouldn't have gone to the bacherlotte party. Two of the other brides maids have black eyes and my fiancé called me and asked if this is the crazy she's marrying
I masterbated poison ivy onto my penis, it hasn't been this upset with me since the Take one for the team fiasco of 02.
Randomize
