I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
to do: lose virginity to hamster dance
Im interpreting your silence as a silent plea for me to come wake you up. See you soon.
Do you think my job would send me for a second drug test if i took a whole pumpkin pie to work for lunch tomorrow?
He gave me four orgasms and I kept yelling "Thank you!" and he kept replying, "My pleasure!"
Midwestern nice.
Would it be appropriate to cancel a hookup to watch the golden globes?
absolutely. tina fey and amy poehler trump everything.
Please write a memoir and name it "Game Boy and Dick Stuff"
I got frustrated so I just stood up and said take me to bed or lose me forever and banged the first guy who responded show me the way home. Thank you Top Gun.
I think that all guys are assholes, some of them just have less assholeish qualities that we accept in our lives and that we can look past enough to deal. They have to be a pretty special asshole.
Everybody posting sickening holiday couple pics and I'm over here deepthroating a bottle of whiskey.
But I thought it was so funny last night
You also thought you were a gypsy mermaid last night
Just found a note on the bed that said "Dear mittens, had to leave early I'll be back soon."
WTF? Are you mittens?
It's a family event: you have to drink. No way around it. Its the law.
I was just at the gas station and happened to look left and see a girl blowing some guy. How was your night?
The only good thing about being back at work is supply room boom boom with my office husband
Randomize