Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
Spaghetti and Car Bombs, good idea or what will end up on the bar in a few minutes?
I am drunk as shit eating pancakes. I am not the person to call.
They made my facebook status "I got my period!!!." Every guy I've had sex with at college liked it.
Just puked on the beach. Hungover. In front of my parents. I love summer.
I just want a box on franzia all to myself. Just me, my wine, my tears, & my self loathing.
sorry i was making out with matt didn't mean for it to sound like that. there was no tone
there should be a new saying, don't text and tongue
CONGRATS VODKA, YOU WON RHIS TIME..
So we reenacted men's olympic skeet shooting using roman candles and flattened beer cans. That's all
I sat down next to him and my bra just unhooked itself
I love how my phone automatically capitalizes Margarita. R-e-s-p-e-c-t.
I'm not in bed, I'm driving and puking at the same time.... first for everything
How have you been? I haven’t talked to you since you dyed your pubes.
Just because you got dumped by some loser doeant mean you need Jesus. It just means you need better friends and some booze
Randomize
