It only happened twice. Once we used extra virgin olive oil and once I used saliva and brute force.
I woke up to 'call me' written in red lipstick on my chest. Thats the hottest/sluttiest thing ever. I win at LIFE!
she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park.
at least after i hook up with someone i have the decency to ignore them
Oh and apparently TSA has to open your present from my family or the terrorists win
I'm going to need to borrow your helmet cam for my Wednesday night blackouts.
It was pathetic and I was covered in butter
It was pretty bad. Like cum-on-my-face-while-singing-Let-It-Snow bad.
he stopped during sex, told me i smelled like McDonald's and went harder..
8:30 every morning in the third floor bathroom we fuck in the handicap stall. You have your morning workout and I have mine.
We have 24 days left before I leave for college and 21 condoms left in the stockpile. Are you up for the challenge?
I haven't seen her in probably 3 months and when she showed up wasted to my house she promptly pulled out her tit
He a gives rim jobs, because, of course a guy who opens doors and makes reservations would lick your anus..like a gentleman.
I love my cat. she doesnt judge when i stumble in my house drunk and pass out on my floor. my dog looks at me disappointed.
Flirting with/getting ready to possibly sleep with a married HS classmate and getting added to a bible study group chat within minutes of each other. #Balance
Randomize
