I hate ducks.
What?
they're sketch. like squirrels. squirrels are sketch as fuck.
I got so high last night I started crying because i couldn't stop thinking about how scary space is
recess is on disney at 4 in the morning, insomnia has never been so rewarding
Nothing makes my dick softer than hot girls in rain boots.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i can now proudly say that ive peed off of a balcony overlooking the pacific ocean AND a balcony overlooking the atlantic ocean
I ended up with a gash in my head from drunken dancing last night. I love life.
I totally just found ecstasy floating around in the bottom of my purse, it's almost like good karma from the time I lost that blow...but not quite
Lest we forget our veterans. Also that two years ago I lost my virginity on this day in a hot tub. Go me for being the worst person on earth.
Are you doing that thing where you're convinced I made a terrible decision
Daily.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'll take care of you. Just let me pee on this old white person's car first.
Bro I needs to be rescued in 30 mins...prfeebly someone died in a car accident needs to be the excuse
We just had sex on an abandoned logging road while wearing snow shoes. God bless Montana boys.
We got cut off at a bar at 4pm. We aren't human
She deleted me on Facebook. I think it's safe to say that she knows I fucked him now.
I don't know why, but whenever I shave my balls I feel more aerodynamic.
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