take it from a girl who woke up with a girl in her bed... you were not that drunk.
All I remember was yelling at him, "Its becasue of people like you that it took us so long to get to the moon!"
She's the only one so far who hasn't laughed at me naked.... I'm gonna marry her.
This is a whole other level of drinking. Like the I used to eat paste with these people kinda drinking.
Im drinking a large pickle jar full of Emergency, water and left over pickle juice and I dont care.
as of this morning I have officially vommed on the highways of 6 different countries. It's a proud moment.
I drank butter last night, who am I to judge?
he told me while inside me and mid thrust that he's dreamed of that moment since high school... awkward
I don't have any bail money, if that's where this conversation is going
Ideas I've had tonight: An entire movie based off the Pixar lamp jumping on stuff.
Strip clubs it is bday boy. One condition. I am in full custody of your ID. I plan on being in no condition to coordinate rescue operations and we need to keep casualties to a minimum. You cannot be trusted.
Alright goddamnit. Can I bring my pirate hat?
I insist.
Remember when I made out with that stranger at the bar on my 21 in chicago? I wonder how he's doing
My friends got engaged today and I learned the techniques of going upside down on a stripper pole. I'm not really sure who won...
Get here now. I need a drinking buddy. I don't care if you're in a different timezone, it'll be five o clock here faster.
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
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