return my video game
Yup u can hook up with me now and not goto jail
My girlfriend and my fuck buddy both started their periods this weekend. The good news is, neither of them are pregnant. The bad news is, I'll have to find someone else to fuck til next weekend. No wait.....that's good news too.
I feel like I've been slapped by Gods icy cold dick of vengeance.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I asked my mom if I was the drunkest one in the room. With 8 days till I go back to school, I couldn't care less about being shitfaced at a baptism
I have my ice chest next to my bed. Instead of breakfast in bed, its beers in bed. 10x better
Just remembered when I bought that round of shots I told the girls to "get their whore friend" who was making out with her bf instead of drinking. I don't know why they stayed.
I'm gonna tie him up and fart in that pathetic excuse for a mustache
You have to sext the same way you right a resume, you can only use active verbs
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now Heβs Upset Because People Told His Mom
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
The problem with having sex on the couch is that your blanket ends up in the laundry and you're left cold on the couch the next day.
he was peeing off the deck shouting "urinals are for pussies" that's how much hurricane.
Good news!! I can adult!! π turning down the strip club on a weeknight has become my crowning achievement ππ
I think my life is a one-way ticket to blackout city.
So... he's my second cousin's step-bro... To do or not to do?
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