Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
Guy at red light looking at porn. I'm waiting for him to look over at me so I can shake my head and he can feel bad
So I'm pretty sure when I was giving a Birthday Blow J, he went to grab my boob, but grabbed a fat roll and asked "You're not wearing a bra?"
Those foam number one hands, are the BEST socks.
Taking a semester off always leads to bad things like having a baby or getting married
Waking up with a sore back because you put the team on it for jager pong all night
Oh my god I forgot there were Band-Aids on my nipples
Maybe it was that imaginary ghost dick you were stuffing in your mouth a minute ago
Who loses their virginity to fucking Flo Rida
YALL MOTHERFUCKERS WANNA WATCH HEAVY METAL AND SMOKE WEED AND PLAY POOL AND DRINK BEER AND SMOKE WEED
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
Soooooooo high. David tried to rinse the water droplets out of the sink for 5 minutes
but like who hasn’t gotten fingered at the state fair?
I don't want to spend an inordinate amount of time with you, I want to have sex with you. Duhhhhhh.
He's here walking around DRUNK AS FUCK in a Kobe Bryant number 8 jersey... Tucked in.
Randomize
