I wannas sexs uuuuu
Come get meeee. I'm stranded in the middle of no where with Paul (?). I think u puked on his friend.
you should wait a day or two to break up with your girlfriend
why?
so we can have sex in the meantime. It adds a little excitement.
It would be been irresponsible not to make cleaning the apartment into a drinking game
i gave you head in a backbend. if that doesnt say happy birthday i dont know what does.
he's my ex-boyfriend's best friend... he tried to make out with me to prevent me from hitting his friend. then they almost fought about it.
teach me your ways.
we did shots in class this morning as part of a presentation. WHY AM I LEAVING THIS COUNTRY?!
On the verge of sleeping with a man who can take me to an early bird dinner and a movie with his AARP discount. YOLO
He wouldn't let me ride him with a Ninja Turtles hat on...
That's the 3rd time I've gone home with her and she passed out on me. I poured 6 boxes of cereal on her and left
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
He's a doctor now.. hope he can cure his small dick
i feel sensations at the ends of my beard. Either I am super high. Or my face has accepted my beard and I completed my transformation to Mecca
fuck emotions I should've gotten more cats
How'd things go with that guy last night?
He threw up in the consol in my car then started crying about his ex girlfriend.
Randomize
