Your vagina is a self cleaning oven.
I got drunk and threw up on a kid at the amusement park. I think they're pressing charges.
His dick might not be the answer to my problems, but I'm definitely ok with testing it as a possible solution.
i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it.
If we both stop thinking about your penis for just a moment, we'd realize it is important and good that you are spending quality time with your family
He's stoned as shit, eating breakfast cereal and taking a dump. All while listening to dubstep. We may never understand him.
We had on the same team jersey so at the time it made sense to hook up.
Duh.
She has either a C-Section scar or a bullet wound, I can't quite tell
I just farted in the bathroom and the guy in the stall next to me started gagging. Its a beauitful day
It's a little sad/awesome that I scored coke within 60 seconds of walking in the bar.
The student becomes the teacher.
I've been wearing the same clothes for 3 days and they're covered in franzia
The bump on my forehead, i think, was from falling asleep at front door, on my knees, slumped over. But we played good music so what?
This band has the most fuckable violin player I have ever seen.
You just managed to turn Dr. Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
Weight watchers just said "you've tracked beer three times recently, want to make it one of your favorites?" I'm begining to understand why I needed to go in the first place.
Randomize
