So I just almost came on my own face I had to dodge it as it was flying by...that was a first
OMG - This guy with a mullet just told me - it wasn't a mullet - but his hair dresser layered it wrong. It's so walmart in here. I hate you.
I know im too high when i think porn has an interesting story line.
Its a sad day when your bush has a better set of hair than you do
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he calls his bong barack obonga, commander in kief. i found where i belong.
The other. Cat spoke to me and left. This shit is laced
The first cat might save me but they are taking out masks
I wish I could like. Pull my liver out, and put it in the corner of a boxing ring, put a towel and ice on it, rub it's shoulders, and tell it to "get back in there, you got this!".
.......The other day I peed on him in the shower....he was trying to touch my boobs and I wanted my space.
Nothing bonds a father and daughter like washing her puke off the front steps
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You left me alone with nothing but donuts and my thoughts.
I am lonely and hungry. I need a girlfriend, but I'd settle for my mom.
Stop acting like the Lucky Charms you're feeding people is actually ecstasy.
Well I'm half drunk in a green tutu at a chipotle. So pretty good parade.
I'm not in bed, I'm driving and puking at the same time.... first for everything
Does fucking him in the back of the car with the sun roof retracted count as star gazing?
Randomize