well when i got there she was attempting to stick the cat in her mouth.. so maybe you should go check on her
I was chocking and even did the sign for it..And you continued to just laugh
Fuckbuddy couldn't meet, so she's trying to find a substitute to come fuck me. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
What if this is the rest of my life? Sitting at the bar waiting for someone to play Single Ladies
Maybe it's the vicodin, but all I wanna do is hunt wild hogs.
She suggested that I come visit her in Europe and hook up with the heteroflexible Korean who sits next to her in class. Polylove is the best love.
The guy next to me just said he wont play beer pong on principle. Im scared.
So lets not base feelings on vagina tingles
Your resume just got faxed, I also modified it a bit and sent it to strip clubs...expect weird phone calls...
Did you survive the Atlanta roadway snowpocalypse?
All the bars are closed. Might as well be dead.
So my roommate just came out of the shower with a dude...guess that answers all questions as to whether or not he's gay
Is her dick bigger than yours?
I'm wandering around outside asking things if they are god
She just called at a dance party, and you stopped mid puke to join. Another successful night.
I mean, I already hooked up with her boyfriend. The least I can do is accept her facebook friend request.
Randomize
