I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
I just woke up with a bunch of French fries in my hand and a chocolate shake balancing on my pillow. Lovely.
A-plus on my thesis. I deserve the blowjob to end all blowjobs. And I wanna wear a crown while you do it.
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
One of the bamboo sticks broke and impaled him. I think he's drunk enough that it shouldn't hurt until tomorrow.
I woke up covered in sausage cart mustard and champagne
We broke up in downtown Nashville with drunken, blow up penis waving bachelorette parties walking by. For some reason I can see this ending up as a country music video.
it's a simple rule - pass out shirtless on the couch, become an airsoft target.
I still have a scar from the last time she gave me a handjob. There is NO WAY i'll stick my dick anywhere near her again
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There are a bunch of highly educated, advanced in their field, PUSSY ASS BITCHES in this bar
Just got stuck in an elevator on campus with a ton of British guys. My pants almost pulled themselves down.
So worth it. Come over for bacon egg cheese vusquit later. 12. I slept with Jimmy? On my period? And told him he had mother issues? No tequila. Tequila bad.
Haha it's harder than you'd think to come up with ways to turn your penis into a Christmas drawing
Is it acceptable to bring pot to a funeral or am I going to have to do this shit sober?
my mom is drunk and is trying to get me to take a picture of her ass. what is life?
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