She has HUUUUUUUGE nipples
he told me that if i wanted to smoke he could make a piece out of my shoe. were keeking this kid around
she just uttered the sweetest sentence in the english language...my stripper friends are coming over
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
The liquor store was handing out free shots of some new expensive vodka, but they caught on the fourth time we came back in different outfits. Politics.
All I want is tacobeell and your body
that's my favorite sentence you've ever said.
we can be functional adults and still think pizza lunchables are the shit
Why do I have the 4 of hearts in my bra?
Haha we got sick of drinking on 4 is for whores so we stole the cards...I woke up with three of them in mine
drunken problem solving at its finest
I want your cock.
All we are is dust in the wiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnnd
My heart feels like a grape in a barrel about to be crushed into wine
Now theyre filling the kiddie pool water with boxes and boxes of jello powder and im not sure if thats a sign i should leave or what
The last time I've felt a woman's touch, the twin towers were compromised. You can wait like one week
She's currently doing somersaults across the kitchen floor without underwear on. We may not make it to the bar.
He lives 20 minutes away driving distance and decided to walk. I talked to him today and he took a nap along the way... In a cemetery.
Thanks for ruining my life with your man penis
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