well we can cross tagging a chick in a movie theatre off the list of things to do before we die
Lonely and bored. Am I allowed to play Dance Dance Revolution by myself?
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
Being this Hungover on Easter has brought my closer to Jesus... I swear he had to feel shitty like this after coming back from the dead
She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
We really need to stop competing to see who can get more drunk, and I REALLY need to stop winning.
Wheres my "thanks for using birth control effectively and not contributing to the downfall of society" card.
I fingered her though her window because she couldn't leave
do you think if she looks enough like a dude i have to come out to my parents?
He said I showed up in just my underwear and a bunch of towels I stole from the party I was at.
Been awake for 50 some odd hours. I've discovered I can spew out maaaad papers whilst coked out of my face. My roommates probably think I'm dead. Money well spent. You?
She can't brag about all the anal sex she has and then expect me not to awkwardly stare at her boyfriend when she brings him around
I'm not sure what exactly you were planning, but you kept yelling that we were going to need a lot of midgets and a lawyer.
While we were having sex he asked me if I wanted to get wingstop after. I think I found my future husband.
I don't care who you bring as long as they are fun and not a cop
Randomize
