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ok, stay where you are, be there soon
Going to Kmart high is like jumping in a time machine back to the 80s
enterprise is going to pick me up, im too high for this
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
but i'm paying and its not a date cause he's got a gf and i'm hooking up with his roommate tomorrow night
Apple should advertise that their phones are puke-proof. They would appeal to a whole new audience.
I vaguely remember having a 'grass is greener' conversation about our nipples. Dream or beautiful reality?
Beautiful, beautiful reality
We tried to play tennis but after about 15 minutes we gave up and fucked against the fence. Woulda been a cute third date so of course I had to ruin it.
We broke into her grandpa's pool at 2 am and I held my underwear out the window on the way home.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He said something last night about making crepes, but after getting pissed on in bed, I question everything.
Don't mention it
Just endorse me for cunnilingus on LinkedIn
I'm experimenting with sincerity
STOP BUYING ALADDIN PANTS WITH MY AMAZON CREDIT CARD
Woke up with a pineapple again... where do i keep on getting these ??
Why are there condoms taped to the handle of Tito’s?
I get horny when I drink, pregnant when I fuck and I never lose the booze unlike my purse
Randomize