Let's hustle tonight so we can relax tomorrow
Perfect. Like where your heads at
By relax I mean have sex
dude just tell them you don't wear clothes. they'll understand
He broke up with me by playing Lynyrd Skynyrd "Free Bird".
We've made a drinking game out of how many times the tornado sirens go off. We're good at tornado safety.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She is going down in cock block history. He went in to kiss me and she threw her hand between our faces and yelled "DENIED!"
He literally didn't stop until I lost count of how many times he made me orgasm. It took three hours.
Don't worry, nothing happened....but we should have a fire extinguisher here.
I know it was you because you're the only person I know who gets drunk and craves soup.
Soup is delicious
Trying to figure out if the guy I'm with right now is the same guy I met spring break
Oh duude it is the guy from spring break! Awk.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
On celebration of the Supreme Court ruling I feel it is our patriotic duty to have a threesome
Just figured out my hair is long enough to tie my wrists together. . .get over here NOW!
You popped the Plan B pill then clapped twice, said "mischief managed" and headed tward the bar.
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
I realize my mistake but don't you dare school me in cock, young man
It wasn't until I lost my earring that I realized "I've been here before". Turns out we fucked a year ago. We've decided to make it a tradition.
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