My pee smelled like sake this morning it was sooo disgusting.
ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
In need of cum proof mascara. Don't judge me.
He's. Duct. Taping. His. Phone. To. The. Wall.
He was uncircumcised
It was like inception. A penis within a penis within a penis
did you know that my friend knows a guy with 3 balls what the actual fuck
can't decide if i look like a hooker or a missing member of Poison today
I was worried he'd break you after the hiatus your lady parts had to take from social interaction.
I'm just over here all sober hanging with two high people talking about how they're "free-spirited stallions."
He's still short.... And probably a douchebag. But if we ever run into him downtown I fully encourage you to take him home and have "I hate you douchebag" sex and lick every inch of that disgustingly toned chest.
So do I get to ride the beginning of the November stache or what?
Oh, don't mind me, that's just my vagina rattling.
it's like my ID runs away from me when it knows it's time for me to drink
i think i passed out for a few seconds while we were having sex but he didnt notice...
you missed a good time last night.
you texted me at 10 telling me to come fuck you, that says enough.
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