Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
it was like she wanted to be a once a week night stand
Some girl just toasted to friendship and love. I want to break her neck.
Theres a dude at this concert at the urinal double fisting beers, taking drinks from both while simultaneously pissing euerywhere. He is my hero
Drunk versus high capture the flag: what team is everybody gonna be on?
thank you for letting me use your house as a brothel.
I just found the gloves and lightbulb I stole. Did you pee on a ATM inside a bank?
Ive seen his manscaping faults. Given the choice I'd rather dry hump a cactus
It was less of a bar, and more of an abandoned basement that some people sell booze in.
I just swallowed some ecstasy stuck in my nose from last night. Work should be interesting.
When i like your selfie it means one of two things. 1. thats a nice photo, friend. OR 2. I wanna bend you over a table. But youll never know.
Sometimes I just want to kiss you without you pulling ur cock out and waving it at me
No? The only contact I've had with him for months was when I drunk texted him from Costa Rica to say that all jazz sounds the same
We almost drove away from the bar with a British stranger in our trunk...
You texted me a picture of some random naked guy. Did you lose your virginity?
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