i just farted in a meeting....took me completely by surprise.
so you made the shocked face and they caught you.
yup.
that last vodka shot was definitely the straw that broke the camels alcohol tolerance level
mid puke you looked up at me and asked if it was your turn to sing
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
After a certain blood-alcohol level, the dog is in charge.
How would u feel about transportimg a penis shaped ice luge to nashville?
So I'm seriously not complaining - but I just fell ass backwards into a Tuesday night threesome. Sober
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
I don't care who it's from we're getting blown. It's a 3 day weekend anything can happen
He kissed my hand AND my forehead. I don't think this virginity business is for heartless whores like us.
I left my bra and a book at his place. He's a hot Scandinavian who is into physics and computers - had to step up my game.
If he thinks that that is an acceptable way to ask me out he is out his goddamn ginger mindddddd.
Though I do have to question why i found you and my brother passed out on his bedroom floor, no clothing between you except his tie wrapped around your dick
Holding your hair back while you puked wasn't a choice. I was handcuffed to you.
If you don't respond in the next 30min, I'm going to assume your in a sex coma, in jail, or dead... All of which I've become accustomed to, and will follow the appropriate channels of notification once you notify me.
Randomize
