epic walk of shame this morning involving 2 subway transfers. I need to start sexing locally.
I'm too high to be shopping. I just contemplated deoderant for fifteen minutes. Now testing pillows
I really need to learn how to handle sexual advances from older women
I wish I had your problem
no they seem fine, they're doing push ups and waiting for a charging toy helicopter
I just got a mental picture of us having sex in a trash can.
You know your in for a great weekend when you buy the booze already in crutches
i just had a pap smear and two shots. lets hit the beach.
That reminds me of that one time you handcuffed me to a table leg while I was reaching for the vodka.
There's 50 people in our house, none of them are wearing shirts. The keg has been relocated twice and our bathroom door is missing again...when will we ever learn?
I mean my dick does have feeling again, which is a step in the right direction
Just ate Panda Express. Fortune cookie had no fortune in it. I actually prefer this. Less broken dream potential.
He told me to grab his penis so I did and swung it around and said “awe, it looks like the wacky inflatable tube man.
Btw that $18 I gave you to run around outside naked came out of your wallet.
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
I have acquired a mango...tonight is successful so far
Her name is susan
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