hey call me
can't. in the shower.
... and this is probably why your phone does not work half the time.
But, I don't have the body of a porn star, so nobody would hire me. Unless they're doing like a trip to the safari and they need an albino rhino
I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
the cops didnt even wait to start drinking the confiscated alchohol from the party
Of course my walk of shame coincided with the alumni marathon on campus. But, I did get a thumbs up from the woman handing out water.
Too many sundays start with me waking up still drunk in my car.
i think smoking weed in a ladies bathroom on the beach with two dudes might be the shadiest thing ive done in a while
Also not to brag but I got high last night and got us a host family in a chateau in the south of France
leave me alone I'm becoming one with nature and doing plant things
I need to buy fuckboy repellant for whenever I think it's a good idea to meet boys I found in tinder
That seems dangerous to buy acid from a stranger on craigslist
Then James put his arms through the window and grabbed him, like he was Robocop. A nerdy, portly Robocop.
Who is this?
I just met him at a place called the meat farm, Jesus be a shield.
He walked in on me masturbating and on my phone but got mad because I wasn't watching porn just tweeting
Jus pulled over and stole. Corn out of a. Field. ... get on my level
Randomize
