Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
false alarm. still invincible.
I'm crawling around naked in my room looking for my hairbrush. Just thought I'd put that image in your head.
I didn't take her seriously until she snorted that ramen noodle flavor packet...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You're sure you don't want to come? I'm pretty sure there is going to be "Pin the Tail on the Baby".
Is it sad that I just used my electrical knowledge to not only fix but improve my vibrator?
Nothing kills the mood when I am hooking up on the dance floor like the DJ saying Happy Valentines.
MASS TEXT: who ever dared Todd to suck on the Clorox wipes last night.. good goin jackass. you can come visit him, hes in room 266, AFTER hes done getting his stomach pumped.
HE DARED ME TO DARE HIM... DONT PUT THAT ON ME.
I don't remember much, but my night is dated pre-Jaeger and post-Jaeger. Also, my boss may or may not have tucked me in.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I would watch the shit out of some full house right now.
I'm drinking wine from the cap of my laundry detergent container, wearing my bed sheet as a cape. How do you think I'm taking it?
The boys wrestled in the living room for the last condom while the girls chanted, "THE LAST MELON."
I sent her a video on Snapchat of me cumming, with a Father's Day snap filter that said "#1 Dad".
DUDE NEVER CALL THE COPS BACK
.......do you have the salami in bed? I'm trying to make a sandwich.
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