I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
So I got a little fucked up on the punch, and made out with the family friend. Which is apparently morally reprehensible. I don't get that.
I don't know if it was the room or her, but as soon as the pants came off, it smelt like a locker room and old man farts.
My mom just admitted you were a good looking kid & if you weren't my friend & 30 years older she would do you. I'm going to commit suicide.
my left tit made it into the crop job on your profile pic, I knew it was good for other things
once again, we need to groom him to be a better human being. using liquor and tits.
Sometimes I hate my life and then I remember I live in the WORLD CAPITAL OF RUM
She busted her face in a tragic twerking accident. Marking the 2nd time I have peed my pants laughing.
Just burnt my nuts with a cigarette. Don't ask. I hate life.
At the end of the date, he asked if he could kiss me. I really wanted to say "dude, I didn't shave for nothing"
I think we need to stage an Intervention. Her Instagram is a call for help.
I think I need to see a chiropractor after giving that blow job
Your final is gonna be as easy for you as getting into straight girls' pants is for me.
I googled my name and pictures of you drinking showed up. Way to steal my thunder....
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