Tell him to shut up cuz i said so. I lost my dollar shoe :(
Someone shit on the floor
found a new level of pathetic. i watched a guy pick out cigarette butts from a jar that weren't completely finished. make sure you go somewhere in life.
So... My dad just saw the Plan B package and the beer cans in my backseat.
Oh its cool I'm sure he already knows you're a whore and an alcoholic.
i love how he claims to not know english but when i ask him to come over and fuck me he's all of a sudden fluent
fuck that im pissed. when I come back im ripping forskin off.
Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
I crashed her parents' car cause she was giving me road head. Its probably best to just let them think I'm a bad driver.
That kid who fell through your coffee table is here. In a toga.
I drank all the drinks. And jump off roof. Yay
Crazy fun. I think I got a concussion from a stripper
40 year old guy made out with me last night while I had French fries in my mouth
Guy just walked in with a 40 and a Honda steering wheel. Where the fuck am I?
I just saw puke on the road at the same stoplight i threw up at sunday morning! Makes me smile inside.
Just got high with dad
Correction: more high. He's sharing gummy bears with me.
Randomize
