the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
I didn't think it was possible for the human body to be physically dependant on weed until I moved in with this kid
I can't remember much about walking home last night. I think I kicked a dog.
He called my vagina a rainforest. This is coming from a guy whose pubes are longer than his dick.
So I'm trying to figure out if starting the day running around the quad in a black t-shirt and bikini w/ a drawn on mustache is a good way to start the day...
I'm at a nursing home getting weed. Lol when times are tough, things tend to get a lil weird
I dunno if you guys are having weird sex or a most accurate bird sound contest but either way stop doin it
Well, somebody (me) put on reindeer antlers, crawled around on the floor, and meowed at people... So yeah, I'd say it was "one of those nights"
I think cutting a patient out of a owl costume is a first for those guys. It's a good story at least.
DONT TALK SHIT ABOUT LUNCHABLES
FUCK YOU AND YOUR WEAK ASS EYEBROWS
I just remembered touching your bosses wife's fake tits last night. Thanks again for taking me to your work function.
So I just got motorboated by my grandma…
Last thing I remember I was riding on a picnic table being hauled around by a lawn mower with an empty case of bud light on my head...
I’m going to Lewinsky this place
That makes no sense, but it sounds terrifying
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