if there werent so many compromising pictures of me in the hands of so many liberal friends, id consider going into politics
They still haven't come up with a cure for a hangover; good luck cancer.
waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
When you wake up, I have rum and am in town
Sitting at a bar next to a guy wearing sunglasses drinking a pitcher by himself and having an argument with himself over if journey is more ballin than kiss. Feel better about myself.
Correct me if I'm wrong but the photo album titles "cause I've been drankin" and "baby jessica" should not belong to the same person.
Heads up. We filled your kiddie pool with kool-aid and vodka. Things are about to get Out. Of. Hand. Quickly.
Yes, do intervene. Unless it involves cowboys with loud trucks and hard 9 inch dicks. Then just come back for me in the morning.
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
its before 9am and ive already had to dip my dick and balls in a glass of milk. probably isnt a good sign for how today is going to go.
The paramedics were not my fault this time.
he told me to take care of him and then he asked me to walk him to his hotel. I already have a pussy. I don't need another one
Stay strong! Remember we're too uncoordinated to be strippers to make money instead of being a nurse
also i don't know what you guys ate last night but he broke the toilet
look when god gives you a dick that good for his son's birthday you don't question it
Randomize
