Sarah, plain, and tall I adore you
i found the vodka. it was hiding in the orange juice.
I just google mapped his house on satellite so i can really see how much money he has. Does that make me shallow?
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
I don't want end up bound and gagged in the back of a van headed for rehab. Bound and gagged OK. Just not the rehab part.
I left him a voicemail saying i went through with the abortion and he texts me back one thing... the bbm "phew" face. really?
at 6am he came into my room and kicked me in the stomach. when i finally got up he was passed out in my hallway and the bathtub water was running
I could've eaten a live cat and wouldn't remember it today. That level of drunk.
In mid-threesome, need more condoms. Wearing a sheet to the gas station. I'll keep you posted
it is a toga and you are a goddess.
my post shower fart this morning sounded like hulk ripping through a phonebook
I just came so hard there were tears. Actual tears.
Ugh I need to clean my floors/walls/ I actually don't understand why boys get drunk and pee on things
Next time one of us has a party everybody has to wear a diaper. But actually you just need a shit ton of disinfectant wipes and maybe a hazmat suit.
No but I was fuckin done when I realized my acrylic nail caught fire when I was hitting the bong.
We smoked bowls and watched Cops for what seemed like hours. And yet I know I'll go back.
COKE WAS NOT ON THE ITINERARY FOR TONIGHT.
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