Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
We've finally come to the understanding that as long as our conversation stays stricaly sexual, we get along.
the igloo is complete. bring your weed and the hat with the floppy ears
How did the whale quest end up? I saw u hit a little snag when the first one heard you call her that.
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
Wanna tell me why vodka seeped out of the memory foam when I climbed into my bed?
True bitches know their best friends favorite Boones Farm flavor.
My garbage can has nothing in it besides condoms and candy wrappers. That's good garbage.
Will give head in exchange for a Netflix password. Serious inquiries only please.
I tolerate his mediocre drunk sex for the mind blowing morning sex. More than worth it.
You have not lived until you've had your brains fucked out on a broken down Tunnel of Love ride. Life is good.
But he was still all, "YOU TEXTED TONY WHILE YOU WERE GETTING FUCKED?!" Like THAT was the weird part.
First post college job and I got fired within a week. Something tells me that adulthood isn't going to be as much fun as sex and the city led me to believe.
last final went out with a bang.. 20 min late bra-less, cum in my hair and i still cant find my shoes.
It's like the perfect sandwich, once you find it you want to ensure your future access to it.
Randomize
