So she stayed over last night and slept walked in to my moms room where she used the bathroom and then proceeded to get in bed with my moms naked boyfriend. So yeah, at least now my family got to meet her.
Just bought purple Ray Bans. If there was any small chance that I would ever have sex with women ever again, I just buried it.
This has been the most pleasant arrest experience I've ever had.
I'm doing homework tonight but if you end up going out drinking I would like one courtesy peer pressure text.
I peed in my sheets during a dream. Like straight up. A whole new drunk.
After the Patriots lost I punched him in the face. But I still feel like that isn't a good reason to dump me.
The best part is every argument that she makes from here on out will be refuted by "Oh hey remember that time you shit yourself wearing someone else's sweatpants at a frat party?"
I seriously have her in my phone as "Legit 8"...even I'm surprised
Based on your 5AM twitter activity I gather you found MORE FREE COKE??
The shrooms have turned on carrie. Change of plans. We're getting stoned and finding bacon.
I will go to bed dreaming of sexy Olympians carting me on a throne to the beach where they feed me pizza and champaign and massage my head/wash it like the hair dresser does.
WELL I DIDNT KNOW IT WAS POSSIBLE TO COME SO HARD YOU HAVE AN ASTHMA ATTACK BUT HERE I AM
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
I just used a coke ridden $20 bill to buy Girl Scout cookies
Want to sleep. Also want to see Alex on MDMA doing really stupid shit. Choices...
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