My face smells like last night's lay. I need a whore bath. Or a corndog.
small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
His best friend walked in while we were banging, turned on the light, yelled BURN, grabbed his computer to play the Thunderstruck drinking game, turned off the light and left.
Unintentionally made him cum in his own mouth, and he just sat there screaming..
We had sex in the bathroom. Good sex. Toilet breaking sex.
You were so stoked after landing that flip that you dropped acid with three random guys without hesitation
she is like a cock bee. instead of going from flower to flower she goes from cock to cock
I just had to pick up my "let's drink and make bad choices" hat, my banana suit and beer pong table from work. Until just then I couldn't figure out why I got fired.
I know I've become a responsible adult because this time, I'm not going to do the drugs I found on the ground
This morning, I found 5 naked people in Steve's bed with post sex hair, and Steve fully clothed sleeping on the ground.
I'm sorry my shit is everywhere... I accidentally got drunk while packing
she peed her pants, took them off, the put them back on. but she only put her legs in one hole.
If he brings home bacon, dont let him leave. Dont screw this one up. this may be our last chance.
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
the weird part wasn't waking up in someone else's underwear, it was how the cat was staring at me like he knew more about last night then i remembered.
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