My t9 writes chubies instead of bitches.
either way. win, win.
I just fell asleep with a sandwich in my mouth at Cosi..people definitely saw
what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
I was unaware that a tutu and pasties was appropriate attire to this
I need you to stand in the corner and ref this threesome. Wear stripes.
Using your ex girlfriend's little brother to pick up women at the a&p: priceless
He said I kept trying to give him directions back to my house in Rhode Island, and that I started crying when he told me I live in Phoenix.
Holy high batman
The hairdryer was like a fuckin obstacle course
IT ISN'T. I'M A LITTLE HIGH.
YOU'RE ALWAYS A LITTLE HIGH.
NO. IT'S RARE THAT I'M A LITTLE HIGH. I'M ALWAYS HIGH AS FUCK. THERE'S A DIFFERENCE.
I miss using glorious as an adjective. I'm gonna start doing that again. And I'm gonna try to get cuntatrosphe in there some more, too.
I mean I only got hit in the ass with ONE firework
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
Wish me luck. My vagina needs it.
May his noodley appendage touch you.
easy for you to say. you're not the one who has to explain why you woke up with a pineapple and a used condom.
He was talking about his friends deceased ferret and I still managed to orgasm.
Now THAT is dedication!
Randomize
