If a girl drunk dials you she's at least entertained the idea of sleeping w/ you correct?
YES
I would just watch. I wouldn't even have a boner cuz I would do so much coke. It would just be funny.
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
Something strange is happening to me, I think I miss hooking up with girls sober
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
On monday, while we were having crazy monkey sex, I earned $82. Vacation pay rocks.
The nurse who basically saved my life just came into the store. Didn't recognize her. Awwwwkward.
I can't tell you what you just drank, that would ruin the point of Mystery Monday.
Almost there.
define "almost". like I have enough time to watch a youtube video or oh shit, put on some goddamn pants because they're in the driveway.
How hard to you think I will be judged if I order 8 giant pickles from Jimmy Johns right now?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
because i know somewhere at some party, behind someones closed bed room door youre being feed a key full of mollie.
It wasn't so much a one night stand as much as one night she puked on my nightstand.
Finally hooked up with her. She bought me tacos after because "she can do better in a bed". You're gonna be my best man.
im so sad I can't openly talk about acid tab Sundays
How weird would it be to ask your bro to 3d print your dick for me
I had to give myself a suppository. That was the LEAST fun I've had inserting things in my ass.
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