i took some ambien and I TRIPPED out...i went into my mom's room to say goodnight and i don't remember anything...she said that i got really pissed at her because we were living in the Keebler elf tree and she was visiting other trees, then i started laughing hysterically and she goes "whats so funny?" and i go "there are 7 people sitting on my knees" and she goes "doesn't that hurt?" and i said "no we're sitting in a bowl" and then i capped it off and said "join the crazy train bro" and passed out.
Okay, I have a threesome with foreigners and suddenly I'm a man-whore
mmm whisky
reminds me of losing my job
Well, McDonalds 'escorted' me out after I passed out mid-order
The cop refused to sing with us, even though he was as happy as we were that the tow truck finally showed up.
I want you to read this conversation tomorrow and be proud of the fact that you taught me how to decipher any drunk message. Good job.
I needed that adderall to break my tradition of passing out at the bar on Sundays
That's what you get for doing kinky shit with a guy that lives in his moms basement.
lets start a news segment called WHY IS LEOS CROTCH BURNING TODAY
I'm sad about how hungover I'm gonna feel tomorrow.
Idk how much of a virgin he is but I'm tryna find out.
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
I love my cat. she doesnt judge when i stumble in my house drunk and pass out on my floor. my dog looks at me disappointed.
Let me atleast have my coffee before you start talking about your penis
got some info she was last seen with some guy wearing goggles
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