Grinding on my ninth grade teacher. Dreams really do come true
If it makes you feel better, you're better at taking it in than ass than she is...
Well...yeah actually, that does make me feel better
She has more profile pics than tagged pics. narcissism at its best.
ohhh no, absolutely not. i am waaayyy too superstitious to have sex with the self-proclaimed "baby-maker" on father's day...
debating whether or not to save the package from my first plan b pill. it would be a nice addition to any baby book.
Thats the last thing I remember and then I woke up in this Dutch kids dorm and he was taking a picture of me while I was sleeping
She had her underwear around her neck. No one can tell me i'm a slut now.
So yeah you need to stop having near death experiences at McDonalds.
i'm only riding in the trunk because they put the case of beer back here..
I have vomit stuck in my nose, you should come with a warning label.
Seriously, it sounds like someone is torturing a dozen cats inside a Japanese techno club while a jamaican yells random hipster words through a megaphone.
I ran into my boss at the liquor store on our lunch hour we both just stood there awkwardly until i was like your car bar or mine hahaha we both need a cab
You ran through a field yelling "I'm frolicking! I'm frolicking!" Then fell on your face. How is your nose today, doll?
Trying to figure out why my back is hurting. And then I remember I got fucked up against a tree last night
Sorry 4 always trying to rope you into my sexual exploits
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