i woke up to see him pissing on your n64. thats like killing a unicorn. punishable by death for sure.
Planet Earth isn't gonna get stoned and watch itself.
he made transformer sounds every time he changed positions. how do you think it went?
I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
I feel like I need to get a restraining order against him but I'd probably be the one to break it.
I'll always be here to give you immoral support.
Pretty sure that I got the MVP of wedding reception... woke up on the bench in the hallway of a hotel and we did NOT start the night there.
I have the slightest memory of swinging a bag full of condoms over my head...
Yeah. It's a great diet plan tho. Just have sex every time you get hungry.
Tonights drinking will be celebratory and victorious. Picture the end of The Mighty Ducks set to beer.
No, that's just what we do when we hang out. We get drunk, have really awesome sex, then fight about why we never worked as a couple
Our first crop came in on the day that they added Hercules to Netflix Instant, I think it's the universe telling us that it approves of us growing shrooms in our guest room.
Then we woke up and they shouted "Emergency Vodka!!" and that's how we got redrunk.
He finally left. I didn't introduce him to the roommate. The sex is bad. I don't want him to feel welcome
We will let tequila do the talkin this weekend
Randomize
