I want to make a zoo with you.
I'm not conventionally pretty...I'm just crazy
bella threw up all over the kitchen floor then looked at me, laughed, and walked away
isn't bella the cat???
that she is
I just sold weed to a guy holding a baby...does this make me a bad person?
That can be our thanksgiving, vodka and cornbread. Just like the pilgrims.
and I didnt even know his name until this morning when we were laying in bed and he referred to himself in the 3rd person.
There's puke on my pillow. I'm still wearing my wedges. And I have a cab drivers number clutched in my fist.
He ate me out in the forest at that park we used to hit my bong in highschool again, somehow this isn't what I pictured being 25 would be like
the last thing I heard was you screaming as the rodeo team herded you to the next party
He stared me down while singing "Let Me Love You" to me while we were having sex. I don't know whether to marry him or file a restraining order.
I just remember lots of butts and something about ranch dressing.
We smoked a huge blunt and then laid in bed naked eating strawberry shortcake good humor bars. We have the perfect relationship.
You snapped me at 3am drunk laying on your floor asking if I knew how we couldn't have predicted the housing crisis.
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
Look fucker, my sensibility and attention to detail is the ONLY REASON you're not dead now
Randomize
