she's like the human form of herpes, as soon as you think she's gone for good you have another out break.
normally I beat off every night before I go to bed even though my little brother sleeps in the same room. So I was starting to last night, and he jumped out of bed and said "Fuck, Im not listening to this shit again" We havent talked since. fuck me
I want someone to please me without me having to show him steps 1 through 5
Is it wrong of me that I wish I could be a midget for a day so I can give head standing up?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Her brother is deaf.
no wonder she was so good with her hands
We played shuffleboard at the bar last night...another sign we are getting tooooo old.
Just did a drug deal on the toy aisle at walmart, Merry Christmas
We are smoking a hash blunt ... Bring your emergency inhaler
At the same time that I bought plan b I got some Girl Scout cookies too. It's not a total loss for you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you think you could handle being our babysitter if we roofied ourselves for fun??
Pencil dick carries the name proudly.
You're talking about alcohol when the smell of hand sanitizer is too much for me right now
You told her you double majored in Geology and Telekinesis. When has that line ever worked for you?
Only you could make a reflective vest look even remotely sexy
just woke up with a trucker hat, half a grilled cheese, and popcorn spread everywhere. last night must have been good.
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